Maggot Man Devours Records

Charlie Bell smashed the one-hour record for transporting maggots in his mouth, but did admit afterwards that “It was disgusting”.

The record-breaker told The Sun: “I’ve been practicing at home with rice for months, but until that day I’d never had a mouth full of maggots. In total Charlie transported a whopping 17kg of maggots in an hour.

“I didn’t realise that they would smell so revolting”, he added. “It was like putting my head down a filthy public toilet. I was gagging and heaving violently but I was determined to do it.”

The record previously stood at 15kg, but Charlie isn’t so sure he’d try again if someone beat his current mark.

“If someone beats the maggot record, they’re welcome to it”, he told a local paper.

Pretty nasty eh? It makes me feel a bit sick thinking about it, I can’t imagine why he’d bother trying to beat that unless he has some sort of maggot craving. Dont forget to check out our funny, rude and humorous t-shirts

I’m a bit keen on UFO’s and anything X-files esque so here’s something else too:

UFO “saved Earth”

Dr Yuri Labvin, head of the Tunguska Spatial Phenomenon Foundation claims to have found quartz slabs with strange markings that he thinks were part of a UFO control panel.

He made the discovery near the site of the so-called “Tunguska event” – a huge and as yet unexplained explosion that destroyed more than 100 square miles of Siberian forest in 1908.

Dr Labvin now claims the quartz slabs provide evidence that a spacecraft deliberately crashed into the meteor to prevent it slamming into Earth and wiping out life on the planet.

“We don’t have any technologies that can print such kind of drawings on crystals,” he comments- “We also found ferrum silicate that can not be produced anywhere, except in space.”

However, Nick Pope, a British UFOlogist who has investigated sightings on behalf of the Ministry of Defence, is unconvinced.

While previous explanations for the explosion include a comet strike or a piece of anti-matter, he told the paper, “This new theory is the strangest yet.”

Sounds about right.. they saved us so they can continue probing our anuses (and we can continue pretending we don’t like it).