Friday Funny News

5 June

Ahh, its sunny again, perfect weather to purchase a fine array of teesbox funny t-shirts if you ask me, which you didn’t.
Anyways, it’s summer so I guess a bunch of you are going on holidays (or vacations/staycations if you prefer), so we thought you’d like this little list, courtsey of ABTA, Thomas Cook and AAP holiday providers:

10 Most Funny Complaints made by Tourists (in no particular order):

A tourist at a top African game lodge overlooking a waterhole, who spotted a visibly aroused elephant, complained that the sight of this rampant beast ruined his honeymoon by making him feel “inadequate”.
Haha, if she wanted an elephant she’d be nailing him though right now, wouldn’t she? That’s hilarious but I don’t know wether to laugh or cry. I bet elephant dick is massive though, it’d be pretty funny if it was the same size as humans.

“The beach was too sandy.”
I’m not much for beaches but I thought everyone hated those rocky ones. They suck.

hang free
“Topless sunbathing on the beach should be banned. The holiday was ruined as my husband spent all day looking at other women.”
Teesbox tip: why not get yours out more, then he won’t have to window shop other womens? Also ladies, it’s in our nature to look at other women, don’t be offended if we gawp, touch and even bed them, it doesn’t mean we still don’t like you to cook our meals and iron our clothes.

look at it
“It took us nine hours to fly home from Jamaica to England it only took the Americans three hours to get home.”
Some one failed geography.

“My fiancé and I booked a twin-bedded room but we were placed in a double-bedded room. We now hold you responsible for the fact that I find myself pregnant. This would not have happened if you had put us in the room that we booked.”
Wow, she sounds horny.

“There are too many Spanish people. The receptionist speaks Spanish. The food is Spanish. Too many foreigners.”
Don’t even get me started on this, you should have gone to Margate then you silly xenophobic cow.

“We bought ‘Ray-Ban’ sunglasses for five euros (£3.50) from a street trader, only to find out they were fake.”

“No-one told us there would be fish in the sea. The children were startled.”
What sort of dumb asses are these people?

bitey bitey
“I was bitten by a mosquito – no-one said they could bite.”

 “We booked an excursion to a water park but no-one told us we had to bring our swimming costumes and towels.”
Just go naaaked.